The Following is GRILL-advised for children

Call me Bear Grills because last night I beasted at utilizing our Weber and serving up smiles. I decided earlier in the week that I wanted to make some grilled pizza, just like Papa Calvini used to make. He used to say to me, “Aayyy, Willie, you gots-ta have-a the pizza on the grill-a!” I invited thehousekitchen’s usual, extended family (Sean, Katie, Liz, and Paul) and my good friend and professional boat impersonator Madhu joined us, as well as Ellen, whom I literally had to beg to be there because she “isn’t that fond of the apartment anymore” and would “not be at all sad if I never came back.” Before the guests arrived I started the grill and grilled some chicken seasoned with Old Bay. While the chix were on the grates, I sautéed some onions and mushrooms separately, for although they were great friends in life, I separated them because I’m a douche. When the chicken was done I got the dough out and prepared it. By this time the whole gang was in the kitch with me socializing and watching me run in and out of the door tending to the grill, the stove, and Gornod the Demoner (a demoner is like a falconer but with demons instead of falcons) who, quite frankly, is overbearing and I can only handle in small doses.

As per Papa Calvini’s instructions, I moved all the coals in the grill to surround the outside of it as to not directly head the dough that would bake in the center. I put the first crust on the grill for just about a minute and a half then took it off, flipped it, topped it with pesto, mushrooms, and cheese and placed it back on the grizzill (with much help from Sean and Ellen because there were some sticking issues). Just about 2 minutes later the first pizza was done and it looks “perfecto” as the Italians would say. I prepared the next pizza which would become a BBQ chicken and onion pizza while I had Liz slice up the first and let everyone try it. Andrew-san made a salad and assumed the role of Salad Sensei, creating origami-like works of art in each bowl. The contrast of colors and flavors made for one delicious salad from the master of veggies. The second pizza’s cooking went smoother than the first and, in my opinion, was the better of the two. Thank glob Liz brought her camera because without it, she wouldn’t have taken the amazing pictures she took of the pizza, which you can see here.

I know we all had fun, except for Gornod because at one point he got too loud and I accidentally yelled at him to cool his jets. He left, sulking and left Harriett, his demon, behind, so we were stuck with her all night. Aside from that, it was a great time and I know we all left the kitchen with full stomachs and a better sense of understanding of thermodynamics.


peace ‘n luv,



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